haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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