For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
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