Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Hi. This might be awkward, but I met you on saturday at about 330 am. I have to admit I don't remember your name, what we talked about, or various details of how I got home. What I do remember is that I was invested enough in getting your number to ask my cab driver for a pen to write it down since my phone was dead. So do you want to meet, soberer, some time?
Hey bro I think you got the wrong number I'm a dude
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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