The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
why does every cop we meet know your name?
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