the condom got lost in my hair
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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