Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
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