i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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