I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize