i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
porn star boner night. come get it.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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