Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
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