And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
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