You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
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My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
It's official drugs can't kill me
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
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I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Randomize