So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
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I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
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They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
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