Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
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