i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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