Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (480): my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion http://tfl.nu/golc
  Replies (263) Good night (3419) Bad night (31235) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (301): Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable. (201): I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around. http://tfl.nu/syx6
  Replies (44) Good night (4104) Bad night (630)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (678): Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about http://tfl.nu/m34e
  Replies (32) Good night (7634) Bad night (968) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (339): View more from Massachusetts

  Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (339): Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car http://tfl.nu/oon7
  Replies (29) Good night (4570) Bad night (653) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (802): i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol. http://tfl.nu/lstw
  Replies (13) Good night (4391) Bad night (1167) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...

  (863): View more from Florida

  Can I come live with you?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (813): watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC... (863): Can I come live with you? http://tfl.nu/y56x
  Replies (21) Good night (5493) Bad night (1014)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  They're like penises that have been put in a blender.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (315): They're like penises that have been put in a blender. http://tfl.nu/9hz0
  Replies (25) Good night (573) Bad night (5101) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (802): she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings. http://tfl.nu/exva
  Replies (14) Good night (3340) Bad night (755) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (412): I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this." http://tfl.nu/x2qj
  Replies (4) Good night (2498) Bad night (967) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (904): View more from Florida

  Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (904): Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again http://tfl.nu/3izm
  Replies (7) Good night (2657) Bad night (861) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (630): IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH http://tfl.nu/xsxl
  Replies (3) Good night (1512) Bad night (483) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (613): View more from Ontario

  New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (613): New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple. http://tfl.nu/c07n
  Replies (12) Good night (2025) Bad night (629) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (+61): View more from Australia

  BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON

  (+61): View more from Australia

  SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE

  (+61): View more from Australia

  THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+61): BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON (+61): SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE (+61): THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL. http://tfl.nu/d007
  Replies (9) Good night (1232) Bad night (306)
• Favorite

  (415): View more from California

  Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (415): Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN. http://tfl.nu/d27u
  Replies (5) Good night (408) Bad night (858) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (309): I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to. http://tfl.nu/ueue
  Replies (10) Good night (573) Bad night (403) Order T-Shirt

Randomize