ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize