so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
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