Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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