no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Randomize