I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
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