at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
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Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
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When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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