Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
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