sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
life is too short to starve
life is also too short to be fat
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
I will be naked everywhere
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
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