...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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