the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize