Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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