What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
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