you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
Two words: blizzard sex
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
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