I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Randomize