Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize