I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
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You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
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I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
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