I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
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You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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