Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize