Pappa wants mamma naked
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think your dad took our porno
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
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