i'm lost and i look like a hooker
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
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