C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Randomize