I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
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