I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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