VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
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I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
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You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
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