So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
jump out the window naked night went bad
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