Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
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