We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize