I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
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