I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize