Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
I feel like a drive thru vagina
My vagina is officially offended.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
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