Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
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