oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize