this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Randomize