i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Randomize